much to say, much to say

Daddy's birthday today.

I don't know where to begin. It's been an odd day.

First, I come to work late and then immediately drive my boss to pick up his car. Mind you, he's not mad that I'm late, nor mad that I've been late this whole week, no, he's just waiting for me so I can drive him to pick up his car. Read about that in my previous blog.

Second -- I hate numbering, forget that.

I got a very important piece of mail today, and I don't even know what to think. The Assistant Director's Guild Training Program, that I applied to back in ...whenever... I actually got in (a little bit.) Initial acceptance. Next step is to take a test, a big, fat, icky test similar (they say) to the SATs. Yuckorama. If I pass that, there are group interviews in May to get through and then individual interviews. OK, so you'd think I'd be happy I got initially in. And I am, a little. I'm excited. But somehow...something's wrong, and I'm not sure what. For one thing, it's a two year commitment. Another thing -- it's in LA. Why LA? Why did I pick LA? They also have a NY program, but I'm in CA, I don't think, I just immediately pick LA. Amy has been pointing out the good points to this -- LA is close to my family, it's a great program, I'd be doing exactly what I wanna do, etc. -- and she's right, but for some reason, I don't know why exactly, I just have these weird reservation-like feelings. Nevertheless, I'm going to study my butt off for the test (thanks Lisa for lending me your CBEST book) and tomorrow I have to start the arrangements for the test and getting my transcripts together. (More yuck. I have to pay for transcripts again and have them ready for if I pass the test -- or do well enough on it -- and they want to consider me further. Isn't college ever going to be out of my life? I graduated. It should be over!)

I also have to find a hotel, decide whether I'm flying or driving -- ah, might as well fly. I'd hate to put all that mileage on my car, not that it can't take it, but you know how I feel about my green baby. OK, so I'm flying. Need a place to stay, need to rent a car -- or no, can take a taxi and stay in one of the places "within walking distance" of USC, where the test will be. It'd be nice to make a mini-vacation out of this, but I know already no one can go because it's the same time as Sundance, and none of you fine peeps could do that with me either. Or am I just unwanted? Yeah, basically. So I'll go by my lonesome, unless someone can and does want to accompany me [ :) !! ] and after the test maybe I'll check out some of LA....maybe I should rent a car. I dunno. If I go alone I'll have that extra solitude time to prepare for the test. Of course, if someone can go with me, I'll have someone there to keep me from stressing over the test.

Anyway, thus ends Part One of The Weird Day.

Part Two:

Guess who I bumped into at Longs tonight? Incredibly weird. Gabriel. Yes, the Gabriel I was completely (and quite literally) ga-ga for a few years ago. I can't remember exactly when, but I wasted a good 2 or 3 years, maybe, completely besottled by this guy. So I'm yakking to Amy in Longs trying to find these LOOK bars my mom likes (that they only sell at Longs apparently) and I hang up with Amy, find the chocolate, I head to the register -- very weird. There's Gabriel. So we kinda eye each other and say ... Gabriel? Carolyn? Odd, odd, odd. I felt this undercurrent of embarrassment for my past stupid behavior and this other total confidence of just being over him and this great, stupid need to make clear to him I'm friendly and normal and a smart, witty, funny, absolutely wonderful person. We talked and did some catching up. I may have talked a bit too much in fact. It was not the kind of too-much-talking that comes from being scared of him, so much as trying to prove myself, or something, to him. (Like I said, it was weird.) So I think he might have been flirting with me, but, as is our history, signals were somewhat mixed. Didn't bother me this time because I just don't care. So he works at Radio Shack, right there in the Greenhouse. And now he lives in San Lorenzo. What a small frickin' world. There was a time in my life -- I am very ashamed to admit this, but it's true -- when I actually would have cared that he lived in San Lorenzo. So...I think we were both kinda checking each other out... I felt the sort of -- OK, I can tell you're interested in something, but it's not what I'm saying to you right now -- feeling that was just ..you know, a little annoying. And then, to top it off, he doesn't ask me for my phone number, my email, nada. Course, he asks about Kathy, that's nice. I mean, we talked, connected, etc, but I'm not about to waltz back in there and hang out and try to make something of it. The whole reason I didn't know diddly squat about him is because I just got sick and tired of the whole nothing that was our relationship. Boy, I'm cracking myself up. Really, it's the truth. I just can't have a nothing relationship. It doesn't work. So he told me to come back if I was interested in a certain cell phone or something -- $60.00, it was OK... I liked this pretty girly one that was $100.00 which means I'll just wait until it really matters to me to have a snazzy new cell phone. Snazzy is a word I'm overusing lately so I'm gonna stop. Anyway, I don't think I'll be bumping into Gabriel again cuz I'm not the girl I once was and I just don't have a reason to visit Radio Shack nor much incentive. There. I've said my piece.

I've been stretching my legs and now I've stopped and they're aching.

That was Part Two of the Weird Day.

Part Three:

This part isn't as weird. OK, parts of it are.

My dad opened his gifts tonight. I got him some war movie. My mom gave him a collection of 12 CDs of good 60s music. So, of course, my dad starts reading off every song on all 6 CD covers. He reads the song and my mom tries to guess the singer. Well, it was cute in a way, but I was getting impatient because I wanted to 1) look into getting an SAT / CBEST book to study, 2) buy some candy to eat. I know, my petty, petty thoughts. But I got into it too. So one of the songs I hear them say is "At Last" by Etna somebody. At Last! I bought Cindi Lauper's new CD just for that song, and I didn't know who sang the original. I didn't think Cindi did that great, although it's not bad, but I wanted to get my hands on the original. So I hear we now have At Last, and I'm stoked, I just want to get out there skating and hear it.

So finally dad finishes and I'm off to run errands. I check out the Longs at Bayfair (closes at 6 PM. So ghetto.) I try Seven 11. Nothing. I borrow Lisa's CBEST book. (Thanks again Lisa!) Then I go to the other Longs at the Greenhouse, bump into Gabriel, you know that story.

So finally, finally, I have my skate. I ask if I can borrow the CD, they say sure. I find the CD case with At Last on it. I grab the first CD in it, forgetting there are 2 CDs per case. Alas. I grabbed the wrong one. I don't realize this until about 40 minutes later into my skate. Now, I did enjoy the CD I had though, so it was cool.

The weird part -- I'm skating down Halcyon, I go into the nice houses in the Manor, come back out onto Halcyon and in a blink, the streetlights turn off. Boy. Dark.

Now I am without my At Last song and in the dark.

I am very much slowed down because I have to rely on the car lights to see the scary rocks and bumps in the sidewalk now.

I turn onto Washington -- and what do you know, it's all dark there too. By this time I've had it with the CD so I switch to my Coldplay. Love that first song, especially when skating.

Halfway on my way down Washington I see the lights ahead are on. And SpringLake is lit.

When I get home I still have energy, so I switched to the proper CD -- the At Last one, and head back out. I start my usual route but the other half of SpringLake is dark. So I head back up Washington and basically do my route backwards and inside-out.

I listened to At Last three or four times. The first part of that song is great. Magical. For all those who made fun of me for wanting to learn to play the violin (and I still do someday) -- listen to that intro. Man. That is music.

Now, I think Etna has the handle on the first part of that song, but there are times, towards the middle, when she's almost talking / singing, and I just think it'd sound really great if Whitney, Celine, Babara...I don't know, someone with the lungs and a really beautiful voice could tackle that song. The violin definitely wins Etna's over Cindi's version though. Maybe it's Cyndi? Oh well.

Which reminds me -- before I went to Lisa's to borrow her CBEST, while at Bayfair because Longs was closed, I went to Waldenbooks, per Lisa's suggestion, and browsed their SAT / CBEST prep book section. I found this SAT vocabulary book and I'm going to crack it open tomorrow. Then you shall see an improvement in my blogs because I'll be trying to talk good like them educated folks.